Toaster Fax Machines

A lot of people living in homes normally spend their mornings with a routine of brushing their teeth, bathing, and eating breakfast among other things. One common thing would be to go out and grab the mail. Why not convenience an entire overweight continent by making that 10 second walk non-existent? Introducing the toaster fax machine, not so much an invention as it is an innovation. Every morning when you're stuffing your face with lard, butter, and your light snack of bread you can have your letters printed out through the toaster too!

The letters and mail will come out along with the toast, being ejected out of the toaster to land on your plate along with your meal. I'll figure out the launch trajectories later, I'll just outfit the plates with a sensor or something. By having the meal go to you rather than you go to it, I'll be saving millions of people the chore of going outside into the outdoors in their night gowns, PJs, and bunny slippers. This means that several calories can be saved each day, making your glutinous existence a little nicer.

This system can also be outfitted with a WiFi printer for it to access your e-mails and print them out for you. If you don't like your electric bill you can eat it along with the toast and blame the toaster for sticking the paper to the bread, giving you an excuse for having paid it late. Wire money to your friends easily too!

I'm out of pros for this so this concludes the post.